On Valentine's Day in 1884, Teddy Roosevelt's mother and wife died, both, died, on the same day, in the same house.
"In his diary, he wrote a large X on the page and wrote, "the light has gone out of my life."
In all his years, in all his writings, the following is the only written record of Teddy's feelings toward his first wife, Alice Hathaway Roosevelt.
"She was beautiful in face and form, and lovelier still in spirit; As a flower she grew, and as a fair beautiful young flower she died. Her life had been always in the sunshine; there had never come to her a single sorrow; and none ever knew her who did not love and revere her for the bright, sunny temper and her saintly unselfishness. Fair, pure, and joyous as a maiden; loving, tender, and happy. As a young wife; when she had just become a mother, when her life seemed to be just begun, and when the years seemed so bright before her—then, by a strange and terrible fate, death came to her. And when my heart's dearest died, the light went from my life forever. TR. Roosevelt."
He NEVER mentioned her again, not in writings, nor speech, not even in his autobiography.
Edith Carow, Teddy's second wife, knew about his first wife, for she had been at their wedding and her funeral. And, Teddy had jilted Edith for Alice.
Teddy and Edie were both born to Knickerbocker aristocracy, and lived next door to each other. Edie was the best friend of his younger sister.
Edie was Teddy's first playmate outside of his family.
She knew him when he was weak eyed and fragile, asthma ridden, and bed ridden and bullied.
They grew up together.
Everyone eventually KNEW they were destined to be married, to keep the universe in order.
Edith loved him, as both a weak boy and a young, virile man.“ a quiet girl who loved books, she was often T.R.'s companion for summer outings at Oyster Bay; but this ended when he entered Harvard."
Teddy never proposed to Edie. Edie found herself incapable of loving another, so she reconciled herself to being an old maid.
Teddy went to Harvard, and met Alice.
Alice was tall(5'7'')," charming, athletic, strikingly beautiful and intelligent. Called "Sunshine" by her family and friends,"
"She met Theodore "T.R." Roosevelt on October 18, 1878 at the home of her next-door neighbors, the Saltonstalls;…of their first encounter, he would write, "As long as I live, I shall never forget how sweetly she looked, and how prettily she greeted me."
For Teddy,it was "love at first sight." By Thanksgiving(only a few weeks after meeting her), he had decided Alice was to be his wife; the following June he proposed. She put T.R. off, however, taking another eight months before saying "yes". There is no specific record detailing why she declined Theodore's first offer, but it could be that she was a little put off by the "thin, pale youngster with bad eyes and a weak heart" who reeked of arsenic."
Teddy married Alice, 19, on October 27, 1880 (his 22nd birthday);among the guests at the wedding, sitting stoically was a soon to be old maid, Edie.
Teddy and Alice were blissfully happy; she became pregnant. They had a daughter, they named her Alice.
Two days after Baby Alice was born, mother Alice died. On that very same day, in the very same house, Teddy's mother had died, some eleven hours earlier, in the same house.
The two deaths, on the same day, in the same house, left Teddy unhinged. Teddy gathered up his infant daughter and dumped her with his sister, DUMPED her, because he blamed the daughter for the death of his beloved Alice.
He went West, to Badlands, to become a cowboy, constantly placing himself in the way of bullets, so that he could join Alice.
We now know that Alice had died from an undiagnosed case of kidney failure( in those days called Bright's Disease).
Her pregnancy had masked the illness.
Teddy blamed Baby Alice; he never wrote her.
All the time he was playing cowboy and rancher, lawman and vigilante he never wrote his only child.
He never sent for his daughter....his friends thought that was wise for they feared he would kill Baby Alice in anger over his wife's death.
He never sent for his daughter....his friends thought that was wise for they feared he would kill Baby Alice in anger over his wife's death.
"For the rest of his life, Roosevelt never spoke of his wife Alice publicly or privately and did not write about her in his autobiography."
Edie constantly visited baby Alice.
When Teddy left New York City he was a deranged man; in the Dakotas, he got comfortable with killing; discovered that he had a knack for killing, and had epiphany, he enjoyed killing.
When he returned to New York, he was a dangerous man; as only a man who had survived living among Dog Soldiers, rustlers, outlaws and gunfighters could be. He was not nor would he ever be,afraid of Death; he was a most dangerous man.
When he returned to New York, he was a dangerous man; as only a man who had survived living among Dog Soldiers, rustlers, outlaws and gunfighters could be. He was not nor would he ever be,afraid of Death; he was a most dangerous man.
He did not rush to see Baby Alice upon his return; he dallied here, he dallied there. At one such social gathering he ran into Edie.
She soothed him, talking about their common interests, and the old days.
She was the old maid of New York society, at 25.
Teddy proposed; she accepted, seeing the weak vulnerable child more than the dangerous man.
They prepared for their new family. Teddy did not include Baby Alice in the plans; he made no plans to have Baby Alice move in with them after the wedding. In fact he intended to exclude Baby Alice from his new family, deliberately.
In fact Teddy had not introduced Edie to Baby Alice as her new mother. Baby Alice was to remain in exile. He hated his daughter with the passion of a deranged Bronte hero.
Edie was an engaged woman, no longer a 25 year old spinster. She was newly engaged. But she was dealing with a volatile and violent man. He could call off the engagement in a split second. Edie had no REAL leverage.
She broached him in his study, and told the future President this, if he was not prepared to bring Baby Alice into the new family they were putting together, she would leave him.
She told him in no uncertain terms, what he was doing to Baby Alice was immoral; that he could not have her unless he would bring into their new family his only child by his first dead wife. The Old Maid was giving the damn killer cowboy an ultimatum.
Teddy sized her up, as he had sized up the outlaws, gunfighters, and Sioux, he had met in the Badlands. He gave in. Baby Alice was integrated into the Teddy/Edith family, which included five more children, until she became a bride herself, to the Speaker of the House.
The Old Maid should be lauded as a national heroine; she bent an iron man to a moral purpose. THAT IS EMPOWERMENT.
America is a society wallowing in domestic violence, and in need of true heroines; may this Blogger suggest, not the BLACK WIDOW or WONDER WOMAN but Edith Roosevelt.
Alice Roosevelt
the widower Roosevelt as a cowboy
Edith Roosevelt "Nothing would please me more than when I die
they put this inscription on my tombstone:
Everything she did was for the happiness of others."- Edith Roosevelt quoted at meeting of Oyster Bay Needlework Guild, 1932
Everything she did was for the happiness of others."- Edith Roosevelt quoted at meeting of Oyster Bay Needlework Guild, 1932
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